If U Seek Amy

Since McBrandon wrote about his top 10 fictional women, I decided to make a similar list, except I decided to do a list of Amys. I feel like the name has fallen out of favor in recent times (top 20-30 baby names in 2000s, huge in the 80s), which is unfortunate. I love my name, and apparently Britney Spears (or her team of songwriters) does too.

In descending order:

5. Amy Wong "Out of this World Amy"

This is an inside joke, but she looks like me. I mean, look at her calf to ankle ratio--she's got cankles, too! I totally got this picture off a "Top 50 Animated Hotties" site, a website true in its perversion.

4. Amy Fischer "Notorious Amy"


I'm not saying I condone her because I think what she did was pretty deplorable. But no one can deny that she's got balls. I mean, she had an underaged affair with a guy named Joey Buttafucco. I mean, I can't even type that guy's name without smirking to myself. Earning the nickname Long Island Lolita, she shot her lover's wife, Mary Jo, in the face. Hell hath no fury like an Amy scorned. Remember that. She's now a porn star, which is where all infamous 'celebrities' go to pasture.

3. Amy Winehouse "Insane in the Membrane Amy"



Oh, what to say that hasn't already been said about the beehived one. She wins most insane Amy for obvious reasons. Apart from her constant coked out antics, she is a very talented singer. Imagine if we could get her off the sauce, she would be unstoppable.

2. Amy Adams "Without a Doubt Amy"


So, I haven't actually seen any Amy Adams movies except for Catch Me If You Can. She is obviously very talented and on the up and up, since she's already been nominated for 2 Oscars, and even sang on the telecast a few years back. Plus, I really like her style, especially her Oscar dress jewelry. I thought the huge collar of jewels was striking, so take that Debbie Matenopoulos. She has an impressive and broad resume, and I'm really looking forward to seeing Sunshine Cleaning Co.

1. Amy Poehler "God Love ya, Amy"


I want to be Amy Poehler. This Baby Mama literally steals every movie she's in (Mean Girls! What's up, girlfriends! I'm the cool mom!), and her baby daddy is Will Arnett! Plus, she's on that new Parks & Recreation show that looks like the Office, when it was still funny. I miss you Michael Scott.

Honorable mentions go to Amy Grant, Amy Smart, Amy Tan and Amy Lee.