Good night, New Moon

I never actually got around to writing about Dawn’s and my New Moon adventure, which took place on the night of the New Moon premiere way back on November 19, 2009. So I'm only like two months behind. Let me just preface this by saying that there was a ton of buildup to the movie, like I read every blog post, watched every interview, bought every magazine that featured the RPattz. Did you guys see that Vanity Fair spread? Jeebus. The six months of build up culminated in our celebration. I mean, I don’t think I’d ever been this excited for a movie’s premiere since Titanic and that’s only because I loved me some Leo DiCaprio when I was 13. Who am I kidding, I still love him. But I digress, I bought tickets for the midnight showing six weeks in advance for this latest Twilight installment and still didn’t even get the best seats. That's how big this thing is.

People are apeshit for this saga. And for Robert Pattinson, which is obviously warranted because he's sexy.

Anyway, Dawn’s parents were in town, so they graciously invited me to dinner with them at Gordon Biersch. I started the evening as I commence most evenings, in an extremely decadent fashion, partaking in lobster mac and cheese action. I really couldn’t concentrate on the dinner though since we were about to see New Moon! RPattz! I’m a fangirl in the worse sense.

Dawn and I attended the one night only repeat showing of Twilight at 8 PM along with some other die hards, but I think our theater was pretty tame. There were a few girls wearing Team Edward shirts, some with Twilight paraphernalia, but overall nothing crazy. I mean, we didn’t have anyone dress up like Alice or Rosalie or anything like that. Dawn and I certainly wouldn’t be caught dead in costume, just in case that shit ended up on the internet or something. Could you imagine? We’d never live it down. I'm a huge fan, but I ain't willing to compromise my dignity.

After the first movie was over, we headed back to my place for a power nap, which shows you how pathetic and old we are. I couldn’t even make it to midnight without a nap. But in my defense, I was two days post call, so I was already exhausted.

By the time we were back to the theater for the premiere, I was in full form though, and super duper excited. That’s right, super duper. We bought souvenir cups of soda, which was definitely needed to boost energy, and plus I like drinking from a cup with RPattz's face on it. That's only a little disturbing to me, BTW.

And then the magic started. First, we were rewarded with a trailer for Robert Pattinson’s upcoming Remember Me, which but for Evil Tess, looks like it’s going to be moderately good. I do love Chris Cooper’s acting and Pierce Brosnan is a silver fox. And I want to see Letters to Juliet because A. I like Amanda Seyfried and B. They played Taylor Swift’s Love Story in the trailer. Whoever made that happen is a genius.

When the movie started with that huge image of the yellow moon eclipsing, I about peed myself, it was so exciting. And thoughts on the movie?

It was phenomenal, for what the material is. I mean, you have to remember, this is Twilight, not Gone with the Wind. Chris Weitz, who was already one of my favorite directors because of About a Boy and American Pie, did an incredible job bringing the book to life. It was so accurate, and even though most people who hadn’t seen the movie argued that it was slow and boring, that’s how it was in the book. New Moon is my least favorite of the saga, but the movie kicked ass because it was true to the story.

Edward leaving Bella was so painful, I definitely teared up. Plus, Edward's tweed suit was just so severe. The wardrobe was a little awkward, not gonna lie. Except the shirtless part, that was completely necessary. Speaking of shirtless, you really felt Taylor Lautner’s Jacob growing in his role as Bella’s best friend and burgeoning love interest.

The movie obviously needed more Pattinson, but I mean, that’s just the nature of how it went down in the book. My favorite scene was definitely when he was walking towards her in slow motion for the first time. I died. He’s gorgeous.

I thought Kristen Stewart did a much better job this time around, especially in the very notable passing months scene, where she looks dead. Plus, they paired that scene with the very haunting Lykke Li tune, Possibility. The soundtrack is fantastic, by the way, I mean Slow Life by Grizzly Bear is one of the saddest songs I’ve heard in a while. And Roslyn by Bon Iver? Perfection.

Billy Burke was very cute as Chief Swan again, and Ashley Greene was definitely more like the Alice I envisioned whilst reading the book this time around. And the Volturi were cast perfectly. I mean, Michael Sheen is an amazing actor, as is Dakota Fanning, and they were all super creepy.

And jeebus, Taylor Lautner’s abs. That’s all I can say until he turns 18. Only like two weeks, right?

The movie was much funnier this time around, which was nice because it is a serious book. People were laughing in the theater at a lot of parts that probably weren’t supposed to be funny, but it was midnight and we were at a freaking showing of Twilight.

I don’t want to ruin the ending for anyone, but OMG can you say cliffhanger? Loved it! I've seen the movie three times in theaters, once by myself. First movie I've ever seen by myself.

This makes me very excited for Eclipse, although I feel like the excitement has died down quite a bit since New Moon was released. In part, I think it’s because RPattz and KStew have been laying low (except over the New Year’s holiday) and after the press tour they’ve been MIA. Also, everyone in the cast has been involved in different projects, including Taylor Lautner's movie Valentine's Day with ex-gf Taylor Swift...I seriously will be like the first in line for this movie. It's about my birthday! And it has Bradley Cooper! And Patrick Dempsey! And Hector Elizondo! And George Lopez! Wait, what?

Anyway, we eventually went to Burger King to grab some New Moon gift cards (I got the Edward one, obvs), and I think the manager felt second hand embarrassed for the two grown women who were buying Twilight gift cards that he gave us the fan pack with trading cards for free. I appreciated that. I really wanted to steal the Edward cut out from outside the BK. Somehow I think the King would show up outside my window though and that would not be cool. That guy scares the shite out of me.

Anyway, June 30, I am there at the theater. Eclipse was my favorite book and I'm excited to see how it will pan out. And since I've recruited her to the dark side, Dawn will be right there with me. See what Twilight does? It brings people together. You go, Twilight.

One day you will look back and you'll see...

Since we've just celebrated another start of the year, I am going to attempt to make New Year's resolutions, although if there's something I want to accomplish, I usually do it during the year.

Before I do that though, to be glib, 2009 was a really eventful year.

I graduated from medical school. Pretty important.
I matched into an Otolaryngology residency. Not just any Otolaryngology program, the perfect Otolaryngology program for me.
I started my general surgery internship, and was immediately taken back to the bottom of the totem pole. I learned that I know shit from shit.
My four year relationship with the first person I ever loved ended. And I survived.
I became a Mac person.
I saw U2 in concert.
I made friends with a rockstar.
I made my first trip to Asia (Japan/Taipei).
I became a first time homeowner.

I'm sure other things happened, but those are the only things that are really standing out right now.

2010 is going to be just as eventful as I will actually start my ENT training which is gonna fucking be hard. Like, I'm trying to take advantage of the easier rotations I have now because come July, I'm gonna get rocked. I'm excited though because I am so tired of general surgery. I do not see the appeal of ostomies and rectals and decubitus ulcers. It makes me want to vomit.

Everytime I make one of these lists, I always go back to a list I made my first year of medical school of things I hope to accomplish in my life. Every year I come no closer to achieving any of those things. One day though, you just have to keep on believing that there will be time and means to accomplish your goals. This kind of goes with the new MTV show, "The Buried Life" which is about four guys who set out to accomplish items on their bucket lists. I will be watching this show because I like the premise and because the four guys are fuckhot.

1. Kiss a rockstar.
2. Live in New York City.
3. Spending a few months loafing around Europe.
4. Sit on Centre Court at Wimbledon. Also attend Super Bowl, World Cup and Olympics.
5. Be on TV or in a movie.
6. Write a book.
7. Travel to each one of the 50 states.
8. Do something completely unexpected and non-calculated. Something that no one expects me to do.
9. Make a difference.
10. Go to Coachella.


So the only one I actually accomplished during medical school was #5 be on TV. I was on E! News briefly once when they interviewed people at the Paley Festival.

My New Year's resolutions this year are:

Kiss someone new this year.
Reconnect with old friends. Deepen the friendships that I already have.
Be motivated to study. (See how it doesn't say: study more)
Travel somewhere new.
Learn how to actually be a surgeon.
Avoid dramah. It's hard and out of my hands, I know.
Go to as many concerts as financially possible.
Take care of myself.

A lot of my friends have been so supportive this year, and I'm very thankful for them and everything they've done for me. I hope that nothing ever happens to them that makes them need me the way I've needed them, but they should know that I will be there for them no matter what.

I think all these resolutions are definitely attainable, especially since it took me about 23 minutes into the new year to accomplish the first one. Holla.

It was a beautiful day!

So one of my life long goals was achieved last month while I was on vacation.

I saw U2 live in concert. It finally happened. And it was amazing. Except for the douchy audience, it was perfect.

I've been a U2 fan since I was in the womb. They are my sister's favorite band, and since she is ten years older than I am, and thus was my second mother, we listened to a lot of U2 when I was a kid. I mean, Achtung Baby was like the only music I heard in 1990. Now, we have tried to see them many times in the past, popmart tour, elevation, zooropa...somehow U2 have always alluded us. We've have never been in town when they came to our town. But not this year.

I scheduled a vacation in October with the intent to see U2 and Muse together. I love Muse. I mean, I really love Muse, so I wanted to see them as the opener and not the Black Eyed Peas or Snow Patrol. I bought my ticket for $87.50, plane ticket for $99 each way to Dallas, and spent $70 on a rental car. My sister unfortunately could not join me because she's got like kids and work or something, so I went by myself and am not ashamed of that. We'll see them together in the future.

I got to Dallas and the rental car assigned to me was a 2010 Silver Mustang. I know right? High stylin'. I really felt like a Texan. I went to the Galleria to shop, and it is basically a mirror image of the STL Galleria. I needed to kill time before the concert though, and there's nothing like a little high end shopping to do that. The concert was in Arlington at the New Dallas Cowboys stadium and let me tell you, the thing is a monstrosity. I mean, it's just behemoth. I'm glad I sprung for more expensive tix because I heard people up in the nosebleeds couldn't hear very well. Which, if I'm going to see U2, I better fucking hear them.

The stage was this Octopus alien like structure that apparently costs like $5 million to assemble and disassemble. Definitely more than the GNP of most small countries, but hell it's Bono, so who cares. There was huge screens and the stage was set up in 360 with little bridges out into the general admission sections and I was definitely jealous of those peeps.


Muse opened and were just great. They are known for their stage show with lighting and video media on the big screen and it was visually stunning. They played Starlight, Time is Running Out and Undisclosed Desires, which are my favorites, so I was happy. Matt Bellamy has the raddest sparkly red guitar...I love. And I love him, he looks like a skinnier Christian Bale. I'm totally hoping I can see them when they tour here next year. Undisclosed desires is one of my favorite songs of the past year, I've listened the shit out of it from their album, The Resistance.

The house lights finally went down and David Bowie's Space Oddity played...my fav DB song. The gods, I mean the band took the stage and I died. I love Bono so much, I mean, he's like my idol. On my admission essay for Northwestern, I named him as the person I'd like to have as my celebrity parent. True story. I know he's preachy, and seems sort of self-righteous, but he's freaking Bono. I mean, I've seen Sting in concert and was in awe, but seeing Bono was like nothing I've ever experienced. I kind of felt like my heart was full...which is the lamest thing I've ever said.

That said, I'm a little disappointed that they did not play Pride which is my fav song. Bono's voice also isn't what it used to be, so he changed the melodies of songs to suit his presbylaryngis. He still sounded good. The Edge is just the coolest...I mean, he's like that creepy silent guy who lingers in the back, but you know he has so many cool stories and secrets. The Edge makes U2, U2. Adam was flashy as per usual, and Larry just sat back there playing the drums still looking pretty young. Visually the stage was amazing, the sound was good where I was sitting. The lights and the screen backgrounds were beautiful, and Bono and co were all over the stage.

Of course there was the requisite moment where Bono talked about the prisoner of war in Burma. And Desmond Tutu did the introduction to their encore, so that's just a reminder of how far above being rock stars they are. I mean, Desmond Tutu. Seriously. Plus, when my sister saw them a few weeks later in Vegas, Bill Clinton was in the audience. They play to world leaders. This is the reality of being in U2. And I will never have anything like that.

They sounded especially amazing on Sunday, Bloody Sunday; One, With or Without you, Mysterious Ways, I still haven't found what I'm looking for...which all coincidentally are my favorite songs. Probably my favorite was City of Blinding Light, which unfortunately no one in my section of the audience knew. I felt like I was in that episode of Entourage where Bono sings to Johnny Drama on his birthday. Especially at the "Oh You Look So Beautiful Tonight!" part. Love that song.

The worst part of the show was the audience. There was a pair of couples in my row who got up no less than 16 times during U2's set. I'm not exaggerating, I counted. Because I was pissed. I had to get up every fucking time to let them through. Sit the fuck down, you're at a concert. I know you don't care about U2, but I DO and I PAID A LOT OF MONEY TO SEE THEM, ASSHOLES. And one of the guys kicked my poster when he was walking out which really pissed me off, and I stared him down until his friend said sorry. Don't fuck with me. I drive a mustang when I'm in Texas.

I sat next to a man and his daughter. He let her skip school to drive down from North Texas to see this show. What a fucking cool dad, BTW. I think he was kind of hitting on me at one point (don't worry, he's divorced), but it was awkward. First of all, the girl and a whole bunch of other people were like "This is the song from Twilight!" when Supermassive Black Hole was played, which embarrassed me to no end. I mean, fuck, I love Twilight more than anyone, but I also am a fan of Muse's music and they are better than that. Then the girl asked to see my poster, which had U2 on it. She was like, "That one is Bono, and that one is the Edge, who are these two?"

I died.

I seriously was like, OMFG your dad let you skip school to see U2 and you don't know who Adam Clayton and Larry Mullen Jr. is? My heart imploded. Yeah, I'm a music snob.

Anyway, here was the U2 setlist. I hope I get to see them again real soon because it's not just a concert with U2, it's a life changing event. No lie. I LOVE YOU BONO.

Breathe
Get On Your Boots
Magnificent
Mysterious Ways
Beautiful Day
I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For...
Stuck in a Moment...
No Line on the Horizon
Elevation
Until the End of the World
Unforgettable Fire
City of Blinding Light
Vertigo
I'll go Crazy if I don't go Crazy tonight
Sunday Bloody Sunday
MLK
Walk On

One
Amazing Grace
Where the Streets Have No Name

Ultraviolet
With or Without You
Moment of Surrender

I am human and I need to be loved just like everybody else does

I recently went through a difficult breakup, and as a widely known music fanatic, I made a playlist to help me deal with the fact that my ex-boyfriend is a real douchebag. And he really is, and I'm really better off without him. And no, I'm not just saying that to make myself feel better. He really treated me like shit at the end, and as a strong, independent, confident woman, I will not stand for that. I'm much better than his shit, which is so Busch league. Trust me, no one is telling me that I'm going to regret losing him. It was a good relationship, but it's over and I'm moving forth. Good riddance and on with the playlist. It's a little hodge-podge, but aren't all of my mixes like that?

There are several stages of a breakup that are represented in this mix.

1. Questioning, i.e. Why?
2. Bargaining, i.e. Please don't leave me (this is hopefully the shortest stage).
3. Anger, i.e. Fuck you, you worthless piece of shit, you're going to regret this.
4. Regret, i.e. looking back at the relationship, good and bad.
5. Acceptance and moving forth, i.e. Fuck you, I can and will do so much better.

There are more stages, but that would take me all day to explain.

One--U2
What Have I Don't to Deserve This?--Pet Shop Boys feat. Dusty Springfield
Slow Life--Grizzly Bear (saddest song ever!)
No Air--Jordin Sparks feat Chris Brown
Linger--the Cranberries
The Heart of the Matter--Don Henley
If You Leave--OMD (or Nada Surf)
End of the Road--Boyz II Men (probably the most appropriate song on this list)
Hold Me Now--Thompson Twins
High & Dry--Radiohead
Wicked Game--Chris Isaac
Anything--Dramarama
Keep Me Hanging On--Kym Wilde (or the original by the Supremes)
Hot N Cold--Katy Perry
Enjoy the Silence--Depeche Mode
How Soon is Now--The Smiths
The Engine Driver--The Decemberists
Apologize--One Republic (it is too late, it's too late)
Human--Human League
Throwing it All Away--Genesis
Don't Speak--No Doubt (quite possibly the best breakup song ever)
Title & Registration--Death Cab for Cutie
Pictures of You--The Cure
Everlong (acoustic)--Foo Fighters
She's Gone--Hall & Oates
Can't Stand Losing You--Police
It Must Have Been Love--Roxette
Breakdown--Mariah Carey feat Bone Thugz N Harmony
White Flag--Dido
Everyday I Love You Less and Less--Kaiser Chiefs
Don't Look Back in Anger--Oasis
Go Your Own Way--Fleetwood Mac
Love Hurts--Incubus
Walk On--U2

And of course, the anthem of breaking up...I Will Survive--Gloria Gaynor

God, I have the best music taste ever.

I guess this is growing up.

I have a backlog of like ten entries that I'm going to try to post starting this weekend. We've got my jaunt to Texas to see U2, partying like a rockstar at Kings of Leon, the day my iPhone failed, and the most major event this weekend: NEW MOON.

We'll get to all that, but let's start with the time I saw Blink182 and Weezer. This will be brief, because honestly it was awhile ago and I just don't remember. So, Nihir, Nick, Deep and I trekked out to Bonner Springs after a long Friday at work to arrive just in time for Weezer.

They played their favorites, their popular songs, and it was enjoyable. This was at the Buzz Beach Ball, so it was really crowded, but we had okay spots on the lawn. I mean, I could see the stage and I'm like negative two feet tall. Rivers Cuomo is so the original nerd hunk. And everyone knows he's into Asian chicks, so he was meant for me. Except that he's married with a kid, but whatever...minor details. Anyway, Weezer is responsible for my all time favorite music video, the Happy Days inspired "Buddy Holly." Also, one of my favorite songs of theirs.

After all these years, they still sound pretty good. Rivers was jumpin' all around and getting all crazy for his mid-thirties self. And although I haven't been a huge fan of their more recent stuff, I thought Pork and Beans actually sounded really great live.

After roaming around a little bit, and randomly running into some people from our school, we weaved through the crowd and took our places for Blink. Now, let me give a little background. I used to worship Blink182. Like, not in the I have a crush on that band member and his picture is all over my wall, but they are actually one of the few bands out there that I own every single LP they've put out. I remember when Dammit came out. I was in 6th grade, and I remember watching that video on the Box all the time. Then Josie with Alyssa Milano came out and I watched that video a lot. I remember when Travis joined the band, and they did another one of the greatest videos of all time, "All the Small Things." One of my first (and still current email) AIM screennames has 182 in it. A lot of my computer passwords have the number 182 in it. I grew up with this band. They were a huge part of my formative years, growing up in SoCal.

So, you can imagine it was a trip that I was seeing them, now a band with most members married, children, thirties. They still act like they're in freshman year. "Hey Mark, do you know what Kansas City is? Kansas City is a slut, and you and I are totally tag-teaming that shit." That shit was funny. Crude jokes and hand gestures. Talking about each other's moms. Calling the city Boner Springs. You get the point. And man, they sounded pretty good. Travis Barker is an amazing drummer. Remember when he was in the Aquabats? I do, I had a friend who was obsessed with them. Oh Ska, where did you go? Tom sounded a little raspy at times, but I actually really like the songs where he sings lead. And Mark is just Mark, I've always liked Mark because he's a lead singer/bass player. It's rare, ask Sting.

Of course, most of the crowd was probably younger than us, but the songs took me right back junior high. Those were some good times, filled with fun music. Yeah, Blink might not be singing about saving the world from destruction and war, but they're songs are fun and catchy and you can just jump around and sing along. Their catalog is impressive too, like they have a lot of popular songs. They don't take themselves too seriously, and that is what I admire about them. Now, Angels & Airwaves? Maybe.

Now I was reading a review on one of the KC blogs and the guy was like appalled at the cussing and crassness of the band. Really? This is a fucking rock show from a group who named their album Take off Your Pants and Jacket. Were you expecting a G rated show? And if you're dumb enough to take your underage children to the Buzz Beachball where every member of the audience is drunk, you're the problem because your decision making skills are not stellar. Yes, it's your fault. Not the band's.

And needless to say, there was a lot of MJ smoke in the audience too.

Dumpweed
Feeling This
The Rock Show
What's My Age Again?
It's Obvious
I Miss You
Stay Together For the Kids
Down
Always
Stockholm Syndrome
First Date
Man Overboard
Going Away to College
Not Now
All the Small Things
Reckless Abandon
Josie
Anthem Part 2

Encore:
Carousel
Dammit

The only thing that could have made me happy happened.

I've had a pretty shit week. I'm not going into the details lest I actually burst into tears, throw my computer into my new TV and then displace my anger onto some undeserving inanimate object.

Let's just say that like all ex-boyfriends, mine's a complete douche bag.

And just when I thought that life was bleak, there was no point to anything anymore, and l--e was the dirtiest fucking word that should never be uttered ever again, there came hope.

Hope in the form of two kids in Paris trying to take a walk through an airport.


This was taken in Paris, as Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart made their way to their private plane. They are in Europe on a press tour for New Moon and they are obviously holding hands. Some might argue that it's more of KStew clutching onto RPattz's arm, but knowing how the two of them shied away from any sort of physical interaction over the past two years as to avoid fueling the rumors, I think this is pretty legit. Kristen wouldn't just randomly hold his hand like she would any other friend because of the connotations behind this simple action. The both of them are much too smart for this to be accidental. I'm not sure they knew the paparazzi were watching, and if they did which they should assume since they are followed everywhere, it's like a huge FUCK YOU to the media. Good for them, they look adorable. There are a shit ton of other pictures, and they look so happy. So good for them, someone deserves to be happy.

The cynic in me thinks that relationships don't last, especially in Hollywood, but I hope they are enjoying each other's company because happiness is fleeting. I really like them together. They just seem to get each other. And the dreamer in me thinks that is enough sometimes.

I like to call this picture, the day Robsten made the Twilight world stand still. Also known as the day millions of girls hearts shattered. It's sad, but now they know how I feel.

When did this become a Twilight blog?

I swear I have a life outside of Twilight. I promise. However, the New Moon frenzy is just about to kick into high gear as we head towards the home stretch before November 20th.

The MTV VMAs were last night and because I am so devoted to Edward Cullen & Co, I had to watch to catch a glimpse of my vampire boyfriend. Surprisingly it wasn't a letdown. By now, anyone who cared to have watched knows the big shit that went down last night.

1. Taylor vs Kanye: I don't listen to country music. Period. I mean, I listen to Johnny Cash and like Tammy Wynette and Patsy Cline, but really, I don't. Taylor Swift wins the award for best female, and she goes up there in her sparkly (overdoing it a little for the VMAs) dress and she's all nervous and giggly. Then for some inexplicable reason, Kanye West storms the stage, grabs the mic and states that "Beyonce made one of the greatest videos of all time."

Two things are wrong with this. First of all, what the fuck, get off the stage, Kanye. Taylor won the award, let the girl have her moment. Who the fuck died and made you the accountant who always rigs the voting at Price Waterhouse? The look on her face was just like pure hatred towards him, she looked shocked and dismayed and humiliated. It's that look on your face where you have just been cussed out. I would know that look, I've cussed a few people out in my day. I thrive on that look, but that's another story for another time.

Number 2, Single Ladies is not one of the greatest videos ever. Just because Beyonce wears a bodysuit and prances around does not make it some sort of artistic vision. I would not put it up there with Thriller or my all time favorite video Weezer's Buddy Holly. Plus, that song annoys me, the premise is lame. If you liked it you should have put a ring on it. Umm, marriage sucks, don't encourage that, Beyonce.

Eventually, Taylor got hers because she kicked ass in her performance and Beyonce brought her up on stage at the end to finally give her speech. They were both very classy ladies, and Taylor won herself a new fan...I couldn't get that damn song out of my head the whole day. And so I illegally downloaded it. Thanks Ms. Swift.

2. Muse: God, how much does Muse kick ass? I love them. As my twitter stated, "Matt Bellamy, marry me, iwanttohaveyourbabies." And I do. And you know how I feel about the institution of marriage as above. They killed their performance so hard, MTV showed a little bit of Starlight as well. I can't believe this was their first American TV appearance, get your heads out of your asses, America and listen up. Muse is one of the best bands to come out of the UK in a long time, and they've been around for awhile now. Hope another one of their songs is on the New Moon soundtrack. I love Uprising.

3. New Moon Trailer. Okay, so Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson introduced the extended scenes trailer during the telecast. OMG. I already wrote about the trailer a few days ago when I saw it, and this one was pretty much the same, except that Edward says, "You can go to hell," in this version which is awesome. He really does look like shit in that scene, so good job makeup people. It's hard to make perfection look ugly. The same is true for the converse, which is why KStew was total win last night.

I'm not saying she's ugly, not at all...in fact, I kinda love her so I would never say that. But I just can't get behind her mullet. But last night, she had the party in the back all pinned up and the business in the front was all sideswept and she looked AMAZING. Her nude toned Valentino mini dress was adorable, and showed off her greatest assets, her legs. Her rock and republic shoes were killer too. Her eye makeup was perfect and for the first time in awhile (probably since MTV movie awards) she really looked worthy of Pattinson, who was totally ripped.


Does it matter? No, he was barely intelligible and he probably stank worse than some of my patients (although who doesn't like the smell of Bourbon mixed with Gin) but it does not matter. It also does not matter what he wore because he could wear a parachute pants and I'd still think him sexy. And oh god, Taylor Lautner. I'm going to abstain from saying anything that could be misconstrued as a sexual innuendo until Mr. Lautner turns 18. I'm just saying, whoever dressed him and tousled his hair just so deserves a freaking cookie. There were so many key moments, from TLaut and Shakira to Robsten just eye fucking the shit out of each other on stage to the actual trailer itself. I freaking love my DVR, you know I watched that shit over and over.

The picture above is probably the cutest thing I've ever seen (at least this weekend). That is a boyfriend hug. Poor third wheeling Taylor. I don't get Summit's worry that people wont' buy into Kristen and Taylor's chemistry if she and Rob date. Like real life Edward and Bella. That's great publicity. Plus, Taylor is like 12 years old, and obviously could not keep up with hard living KStew. Most people also realize that they are fictional characters, they've read the books so they know who she ends up with, plus, no one is rooting for Bella and Jacob anyway. Team Edward, baby.

4. Going Gaga: I really like Lady Gaga's music. Put poker face or Just Dance on and I will bust a move, guaranteed. I don't really get her schtick though, like it feels like she is just trying so hard to be edgy. It feels tired. Plus, she actually does look like a dude. And she has the strangest accent I've ever heard, it's like not American, but it's not any other recognized union either.

5. Pink's acrobatics. Holy crap. I'm not really a huge P!nk fan, because I think she tries to hard to be in your face, but her trapeze performance was awesome. Like, that is some serious athleticism and vocal talent to be able to not huff and puff through that.

6. Adam Brody! Someone found him! I thought I saw his face on a milk carton, he'd been missing for so long. Unfortch, he got forced into doing some shitty movie called Jennifer's Body with Megan Fox and the effervescent Amanda Seyfried (who will always be Mean Girls Karen) by his captors. Whatever, I'm glad he's still alive and looking pretty nerdy hot still. I hope he has a dartboard with Hayden Christensen's photo on it. I loved me some Summeth.

The other performances were all pretty decent, and Russell Brand obviously wasn't really allowed to talk this year, so that was good. There's only so much nasally British I can take.

---

On a serious note, RIP Patrick Swayze.