Thursday, August 20, 2009

Call me Alice Cullen...


Because I'm clairvoyant. Did I not totally call it? Robsten are totally doing it. You may have recalled when in this groundbreaking post I broke it down and gave evidence of their obvious hookup. The longing glances, the late night taxicab rides, the hotel rendezvous. Yeah, pretty much more of the same, except they are being much more public (or much less careful) about things.

It was only time. If a sexy british man blubbers everyone he's in love with you and serenades you with emo shit songs on his guitar, you will succumb. It's a scientifically proven fact.

Exhibit 1: Comic Con

They didn't have much interaction there possibly due to intervention from Summit peeps. The studio should know by now that wild horses couldn't keep the sexual magnetism of these two apart. But, it was the first reunion since the filming of New Moon wrapped, and there was much awkwardness. According to the US Weekly, Kristen freaked out about what to wear! What a 19 year old. Who cares what you're going to wear, sweetheart, it's going to end up in a dirty pile with his clothes anyway. And neither of them are any sort of cleanly these days.

They always had Taylor Lautner standing between them like some sort of celibacy wall (he is 17), and the two barely interacted at all, save for some really awkward looking photo ops. It was almost as if they had never met each other. I think that was nerves plus they hadn't seen each other in awhile and it's always kind of awkward in that way. Plus Kristen was having a bad mullet day. The mullet has looked better. The mullet can be mighty.

However, they did stay on the same floor of the Hard Rock in San Diego (which of course translates into sex because you can't stay on the same floor of a hotel and not do it) and Rob did convince KStew to ride back to LA in his limo (fancy pants). Reports were that she gave him the cold shoulder because of his alleged dalliance with Evil Tess and that he was trying to get her back. I still don't believe he hit that. I'm sure RPattz totally effed a ton of chicks in NYC, but I prefer to think they were nameless models with no souls.

Exhibit 2: Teen Choice Awards weekend

RPattz made his way back to Los Angeles after wrapping up Remember Me in NYC. Seemingly, as soon as he checked into the Chateau Marmont, there were Robsten sightings abound. First, they were seen at Bobby Long and Marcus Foster concerts. Don't worry if you don't know who they are, they are friends of RPattz whose fan base is probably mostly made up of Twi-teens and their horny moms. Trust. She was then seen hanging out with him on his hotel room balcony, leaving his hotel early in the morning (GASP), and going out to lunch with him. Lunch date = fucking. And it's not only her going to him; no, KStew does not play that way. RPattz was seen driving a hunter green Boxter from her family's house in the Valley. THE VALLEY.

First of all how the fuck did he get there? And don't say by car, because that's just smart alecky. I mean, I lived in California for 18 years and I couldn't make my way to the valley. Rather, I refuse. He's from effing the UK. WTF. Like, he must be in fucking love with her if he's willing to drive out to BFE.

Those sightings along are more than we've had in like two years of speculation. They are either getting sloppy, or they just don't give a fuck who cares. Everything is really purposeful. Like celebrities are very fucked up in the head. They always complain about having paps follow them around, but then they turn around and stay at the most visible and famous celebrity hangout in LA. Like, if you don't want to be followed or found, why don't you stay in Pasadena or even Downtown (the horror). The pool at Chateau is crawling with hollywood snitches and another word that rhymes with that. Celebrities subconsciously want to be found because they thrive from the attention. That's why they went into acting. Duh.

Evidence #3: Kings of Leon


By now, everyone who cares has seen these photos. And if you haven't, you can go crawl back under the rock from whenst you came. Now, you can be in denial and say oh they are just talking, concerts are loud. You would be a damned, dirty liar. They are clearly making out and there is no disputing it. Hear that? It's millions of hearts breaking around the world.

I go to a lot of concerts. Big, little, indoor, outdoor, etc. I consider myself somewhat of an authority on concerts. Yes, I will give you that they are loud. The decline on my audiogram can tell you that. But in my experience, I nor anyone with me has ever had to turn a complete 180 to speak. If you shout in someone's ear who is sitting next to you, they'll hear it. He is not simply talking to her.

In their defense, a Kings of Leon concert is like basically aural sex, so it could have just been the environment that pushed them into making out in public in front of a bunch of paps. But then, you don't see Taylor Lautner and Nikki Reed going at it...Taylor is probably smarter than that. Nothing against Nikki, but she dates Paris Hilton's ex. Make of that what you will.

Pictures are a thousand words and from these pictures I deduced several things. Rob is drinking a Heineken keg can, as is the underage Kristen. They smoke a lot, as does Jackson Rathbone. Kellan, the one texting, probably doesn't even like KoL but since everyone else was going, he didn't want to be the loser left out. I've also learned that Ashley Greene is the smartest cast member...well except for the nude pics, but what did I say about actors above? She's all up on Xavier Samuel (Riley), and he is hot. She's also allegedly hooked up with Chace Crawford, Adrian Grenier, and Ian Somerhalder. Get it girl.

On to Robsten, they are laughing, leaning in and talking, he's clearly enjoying the music. She is leaning back in the chair, her feet up against the railing, and he is shoving his tongue down her throat. She may have a mullet, but she is a smart, smart girl. Kellan is taking pics with his phone because it's so hot he wants to save some for later when he's back at the hotel by his lonesome because he's got no costar to hook up with...pobrecita, Kellan.

They've started filming Eclipse, and I guarantee you this is not the last we've seen of the Robsten PDA. I love it.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Do you have the time to listen to me whine?


Nihir, Suchit, Deep and Nick accompanied me to the Green Day/Franz Ferdinand concert at the Sprint Center last Wednesday. For some odd reason, we almost all were delayed for one reason or another. Seriously, it was like the medicine gods were pointing and jeering at us while we all waited to be released from our respective medical duties. It's not like I don't like being in the hospital (actually I kind of don't), but it's more like when my work is all done and I'm ready to leave, I don't want to deal with a fucking lame ass trauma. Which of course is exactly what happened at 4 PM, right as I was about to give check out. We'd finished her workup, but our attending wanted me to stitch up a laceration. I sewed that shit with three interrupted sutures in less than 2 minutes. No joke.

Fast forward, we got there and missed some of Franz Ferdinand's set. They were playing Do You Want to when we got to our seats, and apparently we missed No You Girls and Michael which kind of sucks because those are two of my favorite songs. Luckily I saw them at their fucking fantastic show at the Beaumont earlier this summer. They played Take me Out, Lucid Dreams, Jacqueline, This Fire and Ulysses to round out a fantastic, upbeat, energy-charged set that was appreciated by no one except for us and a few kids in our section. I've never seen a more terribly matched opening act for Green Day than them. I LOVE FF. I really do, but they deserve much better than the Green Day crowd...both bands are just in two different genres. It is a testament that GD would pick them, that means they have good taste, but they were a little ambitious thinking their fans would like FF. It was a treat for me though, so fuck every one else.

That was just the beginning of a pretty bizarre night. Green Day is this band that has had so many hits...like there were songs I totally forgot they had. In the beginning, they played songs about being bored teenagers. The album Dookie came out when I was 7 years old. I remember Basket Case was the first video played on MTV at midnight in 1994 because it was voted the number one song of 1993. This is one of the albums that played pervasively throughout my youth. Everyone was into Green Day, their songs were inescapable growing up. Their sound changed with cuts like Time of Your Life and then the whole Warning album, and then they became uber political with the hugely popular American Idiot. They got real preachy with that album, and they were preachy during their concert.

Their whole schtick has always been anti-suburbia/middle America. They denigrate religious zealots and fanatics...championing leftism and punk rock and the like. Which is funny because they were playing a show in the Bible Belt, the exact culture/part of America their songs poke fun of. This mockery was very evident in the way Billie Joe said "Kansas City" about 8920375038 times. Before every song, during every song, and during his stories. He said fuck way less times. To prove the point that Jesus freaks are crazy, Billie Joe "saved" a little girl on stage in true evangelistic style during East Jesus Nowhere (very apropo). Billie Joe Armstrong seriously put his hand on her face and pushed her down onto the stage. It was very strange, and I'm not gonna lie...I think we were a little uncomfortable. I guess he made his point though. Touche, Billie Joe Armstrong.

Luckily, they diffused the awkwardness with a lot of hits from Dookie, Nimrod, American Idiot and a smattering of new songs from 21st Century Breakdown.

Their set was pretty simple, the main one was lit up buildings a la the opening of Gossip Girl. I don't think that was the intent. They also had TV screens that sometimes showed a manic looking Billie Joe, surprisingly less manic looking Tre Cool, and always calm and collected Mike Dirnt (who has always been my favorite). One of the coolest moments was when Billie Joe pulled up a girl from the audience and had her sing Longview. She didn't miss one lyric. I would be petrified.

The most amazing thing about the show was that it was 2.5 hours long. Other than the Cure, I don't think I've ever seen a band play that long continuously. The show was very high energy, and they sounded actually better than they do on their records. The energy was especially at its pinnacle during the songs from Dookie...except they didn't play When I Come Around, my all time favorite Green Day song. Apparently, they don't like playing it or something. It is arguably their most famous song, so it kind of sucked that they didn't play it.

I am very surprised at the sustainability of BJ's vocal cords with the way he screams everything. The man is 37 years old. He practically invented black eyeliner on dudes in rock bands. They've been playing for a long time. Some of their songs are apart of the ever growing soundtrack that I've set to my life. When I was in my second year at college, I was really really depressed. Like, I probably needed some Lexapro depressed...I hated everything about that time. That was about the same time American Idiot came out and specially Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Those lyrics still can make me cry to this day.

  1. Song of the Century
  2. 21st Century Breakdown
  3. Know Your Enemy
  4. East Jesus Nowhere
  5. Holiday
  6. The Static Age
  7. Before the Lobotomy
  8. Are We the Waiting
  9. St. Jimmy
  10. Boulevard Of Broken Dreams
  11. J.A.R.
  12. 2000 Light Years Away
  13. Hitchin' A Ride (he had us sing 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4...right into the next song)
  14. Welcome To Paradise
  15. Brain Stew
  16. Jaded
  17. Longview
  18. Basket Case
  19. She (one of my all time favorite GD songs)
  20. King For A Day
  21. Shout (The Isley Brothers cover)
  22. 21 Guns
  23. American Eulogy
  24. American Idiot
  25. Minority
  26. Macy's Day Parade Acoustic
  27. Last Night on Earth Acoustic (probably the most fucking romantic song they've ever written; off the new album)
  28. Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)
Of course they ended the night with that song. So predictable. Overall, very good concert.

Next one: tentatively Weezer and Blink 182 (more bands that shaped my SoCal youth).

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Don't You Forget About John Hughes

We lost an American institution to coronary heart disease this week, John Hughes. This man was one of the most celebrated film directors of the 1980s. I mean, he wasn't like a Scorcese or a Coppola, but he directed a ton of memorable, age defining movies. He made light movies that people enjoyed and could watch again and again. From feel good comedies to awkward teen romances, he owned the 80s. He single-handedly made Molly Ringwald and Anthony Michael Hall. Created them out of a rib I think. He was most known for his work with the Brat Pack, he literally defined the genre, but he was also a writer on movies like National Lampoon's Vacation, Home Alone, Beethoven, and 101 Dalmations (the one with Glenn Close, obvs). Plus all his movies had stellar soundtracks. So as a tribute, this is my countdown of my favorite John Hughes movies.

No Pretty in Pink is not on the list. Why you ask? Well, I have a real problem with the ending. I feel like Molly Ringwald should have ended up with John Cryer and not with Andrew McCarthy. And obviously I was right...John Cryer is one of the highest paid actors on television now...Two and a Half Men. Andrew McCarthy had a bit role on Gossip Girl this past season, so yeah, I stand by my choice. Great freaking soundtrack though--Echo & the Bunnymen, OMD, Psychedelic Furs? Amazing.


5. Weird Science. Take two awkward guys who can't get laid (Anthony Michael Hall and Ilan Mitchell-Smith). Add a computer stimulation project gone awry, creating a sexy, badass super-being (Kelly LeBrock...who was hotter than her in that movie, btw?) who helps them gain confidence and out wit the bullies (one being Robert Downey Jr!), thus gaining them the hearts of two cute girls. Then set it to an Oingo Boingo fueled soundtrack. Awesomeness is the result. Really, it's the modern day Frankenstein.


4. Sixteen Candles. Who didn't love Jake Ryan in the 80s? This is probably Molly Ringwald's best role, Sam Baker, geekyish nobody who is in love with the popular senior who doesn't know she exists. Seriously her life sucks. Her family forgets her birthday... her sweet sixteen...because they are all really fucked up and plus her sister is getting married the next day. Somehow there's a foreign exchange student staying with them, Long Duk Dong, and even he finds a girlfriend when Sam is forced to take him to a school dance. Anthony Michael Hall is this geek who is in love with Sam, cue the famous panty flashing scene, but he inexplicably ends up with the Prom queen when she gets completely shitfaced and is broken up with by Jake. Everyone knows the climax of the movie, the quintessential scene of the 80s, the kiss over the birthday cake. As a female, I think it's one of the best scenes ever.

3. Some Kind of Wonderful. This is a severely underrated movie, judging by the fact that I've been searching for it in stores for awhile now, and it's not available anywhere. Yes I'm aware I could purchase it on the internet, but for some reason I don't like doing that. The premise is time tested, Mary Stuart Masterson has a huge unrequited crush on her best friend Eric Stolz, who has a huge unrequited crush on the effervescent Amanda (Lea Thompson). Let the awkwardness and teen angst ensue. This film marked Candace Cameron's first role too, as Eric Stolz's little sister. Unlike Pretty in Pink, this movie has a happy ending, and the two best friends end up together, and the world is right. This movie gives hope to the cute, smart, funny best friend...because you know you're more like that girl than the glamazon hot chick.


2. The Breakfast Club. This is my favorite Brat Pack movie, and one of my all time favorites in general. It truly has stood the test of time, and has been the inspiration for many a television show and movie (i.e. the Dawson's Creek episode that ripped it off). The premise is simple, what happens when you put a princess, a jock, a criminal, a brain and a basket case together in detention? Magic. That's what. And dancing...in a library. That scene at the end where Judd Nelson puts Molly Ringwald's earring in his ear set to Simple Minds' Don't You Forget About Me? Perfect cinematic ending. And Emilio Estevez unexpectedly falling for the made over cute-as-a-button Ally Sheedy? Amazing. The reason why Brian (Anthony Michael Hall) gets detention? Frighteningly clairvoyant. Everyone is represented, and that's the point. The point is that no matter who you are, what niche your personality fits in, you have a little bit of all those characters within you. You can relate to every single one of them. There is no better example of a teen movie. This is it. If you had one movie to pick from the Brat Pack genre, you pick the Breakfast Club. It is defining.

1. Ferris Bueller's Day Off. This is the quintessential 1980s movie. I have never met anyone who didn't love this movie. Save Ferris. I mean, who doesn't want to be him? Ferris is the most popular guy, he skips school, drives Cameron's dad's Ferrari, goes to a Cubs game, pretends he's Abe Froman, sausage king of Chicago, dances in a parade. And he beats antagonist (and later real life sex offender) Mr. Rooney. There is nothing Ferris Bueller is incapable of, but yet it's a movie about his self-consciousness about leaving everything behind when he graduates. Everything about this movie is awesome, there isn't one scene that sucks. Matthew Broderick was brilliant, but it's his words that made the movie...and John Hughes wrote those words. Oh yeah.